Sausage Mushroom Spaghetti Sauce

Sausage Mushroom Sauce

1 lbs ground mild Italian sausage

1/2 cup diced onion

2 garlic cloves

1/2 cup diced carrot

1/2 cup diced celery 

1 cup diced button mushrooms

1 can diced tomatoes 

1 can of tomato sauce

1 tsp salt

1 tsp basil

2 bay leaves

1 tsp oregano 

1/2 cup red wine

1 Tbsp tomato paste
1 cup parm cheese

In large sauce pan brown ground sausage, drain fat then add onion, garlic,carrots,celery and mushrooms. Sauté veggies with meat until soft. Add red wine and tomato paste until wine reduces. Add salt and spices to your taste. Add tomatoes and tomato sauce. Cook sauce on low for at least an hour but I like it to sit on stove most of the day. Last 5 mins put half of parm cheese in and stir, use rest of cheese on top of pasta You could also brown meat and veg then throw it in crock pot. Boil your favourite pasta and add to sauce.

 Enjoy. 

The Binder

The Binder,

 The binder goes to all appointments with our son, its the binder of so much information. Medical , school, specialist information.  From birth to now. Sometimes its hard to go back to those first years of the unknown.  This week we are in the process of a physchoeducational assessment to see were he is at, what stage he is mentally. This helps with the transition for Gr 9 next year and the placement.

We know he has a cognitive  delay but this will give us a better understanding. This isn't the first time at age 6 we had one done so we could hold him back for another year of SK he wasn't ready to go on the Gr 1 at that time. It also helps get the resources needed easier for a successful schooling. But now that he's older and doesn't see to be progressing any longer its important to get this done to prepare him for the future.

We know there will be one more done before he leaves high school to move on to his adult future and have that transition go smoothly as well. People dont realize how much special needs parents have to fight, stand up and go through to get the services and help our children need. It's not something you can't skip out on. It's a fight everyday to be their voice to get what they need.


As he gets older I thought things would get easier but I feel like they are harder, I often wonder if its because I'm older or is it because I have done this fight for 14 years and many many more to go. I guess some of it is because you always hope for the best in the future, maybe he will catch up maybe he will be fine but in the end its what they tell you at the beginning. I often say that I'm exhausted, but I dont mean physically but mentally and somedays I cant mentally take much BS from others. I always try to turn everything into a positive spin. Someone else is dealing with way more then us and I'm so glad to be his mom. And you know what life would be pretty boring without hills and valleys.

So off we go to our next appointment carrying his binder full of facts about him, I think maybe its time for a bigger binder or maybe a bag to carry it in, as we will have much more to put in there from this stage to the rest of his life. Just think when I'm gone someone else will have all the information they need to help him just from the info in THE BINDER how many can say that??

Pumpkin Pancakes

Made these for Halloween breakfast they were a hit with the big and little people n the house, hope you enjoy them too.

2 cups flour

2 tsp baking powder

3/4 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

1 1/2 tsp cinnamon

3/4 tsp ginger

1/4 tsp nutmeg

1/4 tsp cloves

1/4 cup brown sugar

1 cup pumpkin purée

1 1/2 cups buttermilk

3 Tbsp butter melted

2 large eggs

1 tsp vanilla

In large bowl whisk dry ingredients together. In a smaller bowl whisk together the rest of ingredients. Pour wet into dry and whisk till it comes together. Pour 1/4 cup of mixture on hot pre butter griddle. Cook till golden brow on both sides. Enjoy. Note I did add a few chocolate chips in batter as well for Halloween sake. 

Recipe Wednesday Turkey Taco Mac

Turkey Taco Mac

I have found that some nights I need a quick easy supper, my kids love tacos but I felt like I needed to change it up a bit. 

1lb ground turkey

1 cup salsa

1 pinch black pepper

1/2 tsp salt

3 1/2 Tbsp taco seasoning( i make my own)

1 1/2 cup Mexican style cheese

2 cups water

8oz of pasta (i use gluten free)

Tomatoes, parsley, cheese to garnish

Preheat a large skillet over med heat.  Add ground turkey and season with salt and pepper.  Cook, until cooked thoroughly.  Stir taco seasoning into turkey, then stir in water, salsa and pasta.  Bring mixture to a boil. Stir cover and reduce heat to simmer. Cook for about 15 mins until pasta is tender. Turn off heat and stir in cheese. Add tomatoes, cheese and parsley to garnish top.  Serve with sour cream and a garden salad. Yum. 

Taco seasoning 

1/2 Tbsp chili powder

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/4 tsp oregano

1/2 tsp paprika

1 1/2 tsp cumin

1 tsp black pepper

Mix all ingredients together in a small bowl this recipe is equivalent to 1 package of store bought taco seasoning. I usually make it x4 and put it in container, so i always have it on hand. 

Hope you enjoy both recipes. 

recipe Wednesday Energy Balls.

Energy Balls

Even though I have lost 35lbs I still crave junk and chocolate, these help me through my cravings

1/2 cup peanut butter

1/3 cup honey

1/2 unsweetened coconut

1/2 cup ground flaxseed

1 Tbsp chia seeds

1 cup oatmeal

1/2 cup chocolate chips or 1/2 cup dried cranberries 

Mix all together, roll into 1 inch balls I use a 1" icecream scoop, put in freezer to set 30 mins then into plastic bag, I store mine in freezer for a nice cold treat, you could also store in fridge. 

Enjoy 

Holes in the system

As we try to prepare for our sons future, we are realizing there are huge holes in the system.  So a couple of months ago I had a meeting with one of our supports, I thought I might as well ask about what happens when he turns 18??  Should be easy transition right?? Well think again.............

When he is 17.5 years old I have to apply him for disability so that he gets the funding he needs but also at that age he will start changing all his doctors to adult doctors, which seems wrong that he has had the same doctors since birth but that changes at 18?? And to top it off there are waiting lists so that should be interesting.  Those things we will deal with the best we can, but one area that I was shocked with and later have learnt so many others are shocked with is the services we will have to wait for.....................................................................................

Housing 8-12 year wait list
Respite stops and there's a wait list but we can pay our respite with his disability money??????
Services wait list
Day Programs not where we live so I will be transporting him

Ok so I have a huge problem with this.  He will go to school till he's 21 where he will learn as many life skills as possible for him to be independent as he can be, yet it could take up to age 30 before he can get housing??

Don't get me wrong, we would gladly take care of him at home for the rest of our lives, but we know that wont be what he needs, our small community doesn't have programs for him or transit which is one of the many life skills he learns at school.  So when he turns of age do we pack up our whole lives and move to a city centre where he can still have access to programs ect? Do we move our daughter who will be on her last years of high school so her brother gets what he needs??  Do we uproot everyone now? The only place I have help that I need from family and where my business is??

What about the people who care for their children till they no longer cant then do they have to wait 8-12 years??  This makes no sense to me. Why isn't there the housing and supports for people like my son, who will need assisted living? What about the people that need more help, cant help themselves at all??

I feel he may lose those important life skills that he will work so hard on in his high school career, we know he has a cognitive delay, we know he is no longer progressing in his learning, so why isn't there more help for families like ours and how do we try to get more?? Government?? Lol.

I have total anxiety over it, his whole life we have tried to make him the most independent person he can be, we make things and do things to help with that, a wonderful school so he can do the best he can do, even though its 35mins away from home, early morning and late afternoons home.  But we do all that so he can thrive and at 21 he's on his own with no supports, schools done, home with mom and dad and then what??????????????????????????????????????????????? Wait till he makes it to the top of the list, I guess that's the only option we have.

There are big giant holes in our system for him, for others, for families, and where do we start to fix it????

Spring Vegetable Cheese Tart

Another great recipe from cooking school with our family twist, kids and hubby really enjoyed it!! I ate inside but not phyllo because its not gluten free but enjoyed it as well.  Perfect for brunch, lunch or supper hope you enjoy it as much as we did. 

Spring Vegetable Cheese Tart

2 tubs of smooth ricotta, drained

2 eggs

2 garlic cloves, finely minced

1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese

1/2 cup grated Monterey Jack cheese

1/2 cup grated mozzarella cheese

Salt and pepper to taste

8 sheets of phyllo dough

Olive oil spray

1 bunch of asparagus, cut in thirds diagonally

1/2 red onion cut finely

1/2 cup peas

1/2 cup cherry tomatoes cut in half

Preheat the oven to 400. Line baking cheet with foil and spray with olive oil. Lay onion and asparagus on baking sheet and bake until they have colour and are cooked.

In a bowl combine, ricotta, eggs, and garlic, add parm, mozzarella and Monterey Jack cheeses, season with salt and pepper, put in fridge until ready to use

Spray 9x13 pan with olive oil. Lay 2 layers of phyllo in the pan and spray the sheet with the oil, then fill the tart base with 1/3 of the ricotta mixture and 1/3 of onions, asparagus, peas amd cherry tomatoes then add 2 more sheets of phyllo and repeat 2 more times ending with 2 phyllo sheets to cover all drizzle top with olive oil and bake for 30 mins or until golden (can spinkle some parm on top as well)

So good hope you enjoy it too !!

Hills and Valleys

I often feel bad for taking time for myself or buying something for myself as I'm sure many of you do to.  Why is this?  I mean I work, I pay bills but if I want new shoes, there always seem to be more important things, like kids shoes or summer is coming and they will need new summer clothes. The thing is my kids dressers are full of clothes and I wear the same things. I think that's part of being a mom.

However the last little while I have put myself first. I am gluten free and they all are alright with that, I walk everyday and they are alright with that, I signed up to be a beachbody coach and with a bit of financial planning (no more eating out) they are alright with that so why do I feel so guilty??

Guilt must be the top feeling in a moms life, who knows why but we seem to all have it, men on the other hand dont seem to have it as much, they deserve things lol.  Which I truly wish I could be the same.

I'm enjoying putting myself at the top and the guilt is going away, because truly I'm doing it to help us all live a happy healthy life and I'm showing the kids that hard work pays off.  I'm 30 pounds lighter, not only in weight but I feel lighter in my worries and thoughts. I'm starting to get some confidence and when someone says I look good I say thank you, I feel good instead of ......................no I dont or whatever.

I eat well workout with 21dayfix everyday and walk most, who is the person I have become?  A better mommy, a better wife and a better friend. And you know what I'm truly happy!!  Im happy with myself for the first time in many years and its nothing to do with my children, I have totally done this for myself.  I still have a hill to climb but I'm doing it and look forward to the next valley.

beachbodycoach.com/jangatti check out my journey

Thankful

Being a parent of a special needs child, is not always an easy life, but I'm thankful everyday to have him.
Being a wife isn't always an easy life, but I'm always thankful to have a best friend.
Being a momma isn't always easy but I wouldn't have it any other way and I'm thankful to have such amazing kids.

Life isn't always easy, but we seem to get through it even at the worse times. I talk a lot about what's going on here and maybe come off as a Debbie Downer, or maybe you feel sorry for us, but please dont.

Our children are the greatest gift god could of ever given us. Our son is our angel.  He told me once when I asked him how I got so lucky to have him that he picked me from the clouds, he was in the clouds and saw me and wanted me to be his Mommy.  I truly believe I was given this amazing child for a reason.  Maybe to make people aware of disabilities, maybe to challenge me, but truly to make me a better person.

I often wonder if he was perfectly fine, if my husband and I would still be married?? He has made us both stronger, and closer because we are the only two who really "GET IT" and understand it. Family doesn't totally get it, friends dont either, but the two of us understand what we both go through all the ups and downs and that we can count on each other

So even on the worse of days I'm thankful to have the litttle family I have, and you know what, in the end, the day will end and a new one starts. We can do a lot if we take the time to be thankful, even if its a tiny little thing be thankful for what you have and hold on to that and you'll move to the next day and may be thankful for more.

Love and Thankfulness

Recipe Wednesday-Nana's Mac n Cheese

Nana's Mac n Cheese

Truly a family favourite. It was when I was a child and now my children also love my moms mac n cheese. Hope Nana doesn't mind I'm using her recipes, but one everyone should try. 

3 Tbsp butter

3 tbsp flour

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

1 tsp dry mustard powder 

3 cups milk

3 cups cheddar cheese

2 cups dry macaroni

In saucepan melt butter, add flour, salt, pepper.

                    Slowly mix in milk.  When thickened remove from heat and add cheese.

Cook macaroni as per box instructions drain and add to cheese sauce.

                          Transfer to casserole dish and bake at 350 for 30 mins.

Stuffed Squash

Stuffed Squash

Our daughter and I attend cooking classes together, she is only 8 but loves to cook and wants to be a chef when she grows up (for now).  Here is a recipe that we learned at cooking school and we love and make all the time.  We have changed it a little to what we like.

1 medium spaghetti squash

1 Tbsp EV olive oil

1/3 cup balsamic salad dressing

1 cup baby spinach

1 onion, diced

1 garlic clove, minced

1 carrot, diced

1/2 red pepper, diced

Salt and pepper to taste

3/4 cup grated mozzarella

1/4 cup grated Parmesan

Preheat oven to 400F.  Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

Slice your squash in half lengthwise and scoop out the seeds. rub a little olive oil on each squash, place on prepared baking sheet face down, and roast for 30-40 mins, or until tender and easily pierced with a fork, set aside to cool. 

In small pan, saunte the onion, garlic, carrot and pepper in a little olive oil, until softened. Add the spinach, and when wilted toss the mixtures in the dressing and combine well. Season if necessary. 

Combine the cheeses and sprinkle a little of the cheese in each of the squash and stuff each with veg mixture. Top with remaining cheese. Tent the baking sheet with aluminum foil. Bake for 20-30 mins or until warmed through

Serve and Enjoy

You can also add cooked chicken breast to stuffing mix, for a whole meal in one.

Taking care of Mom

The end of last year I realized how important it is for me to take care of myself, my husband wasn't feeling well for months and they discovered that he had a blockage in a artery of his heart. In November he had to have 3 stents in the artery and they told us it was 99% blocked and we are lucky he didn't have a heart attack or worse.  He's only 42 so such a scary thing for us to go through.  Someone was truly watching over him.

During the months before, I really wasn't feeling well either. So I stared seeing a naturopathic doctor. She helped me realize that food was my problem. I have always been overweight and complained about it but really really like food, its truly and addiction. I also use it to help me get through tough times, I eat my blues away. Bad idea all around, then I get mad at myself for eating it and it's a vicious circle.

In September I started a life change, gluten free, less sugar and exercise. I have trouble with the me time but I'm working on it. I have tried weight watchers a number of times and have looked into all different diets, but you know what I have done this on my own. And have lost 25 pounds.  Over the winter and Christmas I have had a hard time staying away from junk and sugar , it was so yucky outside and I didn't feel like getting out. But as the days get longer I have wanted to push myself, so I haven't lost anything in 3 months but haven't gained any either.

Now I'm on a mission to go full force and get another 15-20 lbs off before summer. Not to look better (although I do like the compliments) but to feel better and be a healthy mom.

You see I have a little different situation. Both my children aren't going to go off to collage, get a career have a family and take care of me. Our son I will have to take care of for the rest of my life so I have to try to make it a long healthy life so I can do that.

My husband is better but is a diabetic as well. I'm afraid that I will be taking care of him too someday, just cause he has so much family history of heart disease and diabetes that he can try to be a healthy him too, but he has things stacked against him and I have none stacked against me except taking care of my health.

I have lost 25 lbs of bread and butter, lets see if I can lose 20 more of sugar and chocolate.
I cant take care of everyone else, until I take care of myself first........

My before and after so far. Oct 2015 top/ March 2017 bw

Recipe Wednesday-Salmon Loaf

Salmon Loaf

A family favourite.  Easy, quick and delicious. 

2 cans (213g) salmon

1 sleeve crackers (saltines)

3/4 cup milk

2 beaten eggs

1/4 tsp pepper

1/2 tsp salt

Mix all together and place in loaf pan

Bake at 350 for 1 hr

Serve hot Enjoy. 

Fixable Problems

The Winter Blues have done a number on me this year. I have wanted to stay in and be a hermit. Most of all though I have kind of been having a pity party for myself. I can usually get that way once and awhile but only for a day or two and then life goes on, but this time its been a hard hole to climb out of.  All those little things seem to have built up so much that they all seem to hit me at once.  Talking to people as I do with my job, I dont feel I'm the only one who feels this way.  You know what has gotten me so upset though, are those people who complain so much about their situation, but do nothing about it and those situations are usually very fixable.

My New Years resolution was to not worry about others and only live for the 4 people under my roof.  So I have tried to keep that up, not an easy task. People dont like it when you change and do for yourself. But as I have tried to step back I realize, those people probably mean more to me then me to them.  I dont see then texting me or stopping by, I was always doing the running or listening.

We in this house have a few non fixable issues, I have had a hard time with thinking of the future, but know I need to get things started to make the future as good as possible. As I was driving the other day, I felt I had to talk to someone, I pulled over and called the one person who would listen to me, not fix things or sweep them under the carpet, but truly listen to me while I cried and screamed, that one person who "gets it" the person that I dont always go to because I dont want to burden them with more worries, and specially not to worry about me the strong, mothering, take care of everyone person I am.  But that one person tis truly my best friend......................my husband.

We have had lots of bumps in the road over the last 22 years, but realizing this last year that I could of lost him forever has made me a better wife, and I seem to be able to confide in him more then ever.  And when we have a fixable problem we seem to work together to fix it. The other issues,  as he always tells me will work out in the end. Maybe just maybe me walking away from others problems have made he walk back to him and our family, after all on my headstone someday it wont say,

Janelle Gatti
Helps others and takes care of everyone.

It will say................................

Janelle Gatti
Wife and Mother.

Remember to look real hard at your problems and see if they are fixable.........................

Appointments

I dont think people realize what goes into being a mom of a special needs child. Doctors appointments are a huge part of our lives. We know how long it takes to get from home to the ER, its 43 mins from our door to the ER door for us.

Doctor appointments aren't in our town, we travel to see the doctors our son needs, we go to two different cities both 45-60 mins away. It's never an in and out thing, its an all day adventure.

In the next 6 weeks we will be going to the eye doctor twice, he's having an EEG, a neurologist appointment, a orthopaedic doctor, and probably be referred to see a upper limb doc due to him repeatedly dislocating his shoulder.  He also has school, massage, dentist, respite and bowling in those 6 weeks. Oh ya and its March Break during this time. Thats just him, we do have a daughter that needs me too and who will most likely be keeping Nana company for some of those appointments.

It will be an overload of information as I'm going to get some answers with these appointments , I feel sometimes he gets shoved to the side, I hear a lot "well that comes with cerebral palsy"or "he has epilepsy", not good enough anymore I need to know exactly what's happening and get him what he needs. I'm going to one of the appointments with a lot of info, speech assessment, school report, physio and OT assessment, which has all been organized through me, so there will be no stone left unturned. I have to fight for him who else will??

Because of my husbands work schedule, I do all appointments by myself, he cant take off 6 days in 6 weeks to go with me. But by the time I get home I dont feel like talking so I feel as he misses out on all that was said. I usually call him (when he is available), my mom and sister as soon as we get out just to get it off my chest.

Many of appointments I cry all the way home, he sits in the back on his ipad so he cant see me. I just need this venting so when we get home I can be a more focused mommy to both of my children.  I dont ever book anything after our appointments because we are both exhausted. Info is exhausting, getting in and out of the car and getting to where we need to be in exhausting, driving is exhausting. You get the point.

So as we get through the 6 weeks of March and April I will be glad to see the end of it but happy to have the info I need to support and take care of what he needs at this time.

People always tell me God only gives you what you can handle, well God no more appointments for a little while please. Lol.

Enjoy your day everyone, remember to be kind to one another, you never know what others are going through!! 💕💕

The Dreaded Renos

We are going to renovate our bathroom and we have to do things a little different then most people. Ideally it would be nice to have a shower and tub but our bathroom is the size of a shoebox so that wont work.  We have looked at financial help through charities to help with a reno, but every contractor we have had wants to either start from new or add a big piece on to our house with a handicap bathroom and bigger bedrooms, which would be great but the charities wont pay for all that, and with really a one income family we dont have the means to do all that. So we will probably do what most families with special needs do, we work with what we have and do it ourselves. Do we take out the bath tub and just go with a shower?? But it needs to be for a family of 4 not just for our son. I want it so my son can be indepentant as possible but my daughter and I love our baths. So hard. The main goal is to get a bidet toilet seat, which we laugh that we will be the only house in our little town to have a bidet. Lol. I'm hoping this will help our son be independent in that area as well, cause he is getting older and who wants their mom to wipe their bum??  So here we are in the home improvement store looking at everything and WOW our budget is small, why does everything have to be so hard and expensive?  We have a handle on the tub now but its getting old, so we need another of those, tile or plastic surround around tub/shower?  I went in the store with high hopes and came out kind of deflated. But we will do what we always do slow and sure it will get done. My goal is by the end of 2017 we will have a solid functioning safe bathroom for the 4 of us. Not all the bells and whistles I would like but what we need.  I do wish it was easier for families with special needs to get what they need and not be such a long hard process, the paper work alone is exhausting, we have to fill out hordes of paperwork every time we have doctors appointments ect let alone to get funding for renos.  So we will try to get some funding for the equipment that he needs in the bathroom, my parents have helped us with some funds and my handy man aka my husband will be the contractor, he has done all of our renos and now he can add bathroom to the list. What I dont understand is, isn't a disability a disability and shouldn't everyone get what they need?? Doesn't seem right. It's so easy for some people to get whatever they need or want but the people that really need it cant. What people dont understand is that it all goes by household income not disability which it seems if you try to make a living, then your out of luck for a helping hand. So many special needs families have issues with getting financial help. So we will do what we always do and we will be prouder for knowing we did it on our own.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

There is so many different recipes for Chocolate Chip Cookies, they truly are mostly the same.  Here is one that I like the best.

1 cup of butter

3/4 cup brown sugar

3/4 cup white sugar

2 eggs

2 tsp vanilla 

1 tsp baking soda

2 1/4 cups flour

1 cup semi sweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350.  In a mixing bowl, cream butter and sugars together.

Add eggs and vanilla cream together

Add baking soda and flour

Once mixed add in chocolate chips

I use a medium icecream scoop to drop dough on cookie sheet, we like bigger cookies. 

Around 1 1/2 Tbsp for a bigger cookie

Bake for 12 mins let cool on cooling rack 

ENJOY!!

Real Life

 All my blogs have not been so people could feel sorry for us, they have been for awareness and education. We are not looking for pity, we are looking for acceptance. He is not a burden to us, he's been the biggest blessing. I'm not looking to get anything out of this, except to show you how to accept and include people with different abilities. In the crazy world we live in these are somethings that I have wondered if people think. Seems like people see the glass half empty not half full. It's sad we focus on the bad not the good. Well I have been taught there is so much good, I can't believe anyone would be interested in my little family but you all have been. It makes my heart grow to know@ people truly care about a family they dont even know. I once was asked if I could give him a pill to make him "normal" would I???? I would NOT he is who he is and I wouldn't change that for the world. What is "normal" anyways??  I'm sure I dont fit in the "normal" category do you? We often get told "but he looks normal" well what is a disablilty suppose to look like?? I dont understand these questions he is my son and even if he had 6 eyes, two heads, eight legs he would still be my son and I would love him with all of my heart and soul. So next time you maybe think about saying something to or about someone, remember if you say it, you cant take it back. All people have feelings and feelings can get hurt. Remember to open your mind and heart to all people just not the ones that look "normal".

Warm Spinach Dip

One of our favs for Super Bowl Sunday. It's warm, cheesy and so delicious!!

Warm Spinach Dip.

8oz cream cheese
1 cup of sour cream
pinch cayenne pepper
1 tsp minced garlic
100g chopped frozen spinach defrosted and liquid squeezed out
1 cup of grated cheddar cheese plus 1/2 cup for top.
Mix all ingredients together and place in small casserole dish

Put in a 350 degree oven for 30 mins or until golden and bubbly

Serve warm with nacho chips.
Enjoy 😊

Just a Mom!!

Often people will say I dont know how you do it, your an amazing mom.  But I'm not an amazing mom, I'm like any other mom who puts their children first. Today I thought I would post about the struggles raising 2 children, one with special needs. One of the biggest hardships is working. I always joke who would hire me, I need the hours of 9:30-3:00 with Friday's off and I may be in tomorrow but I'll have to see how the morning goes. With two children in different schools, lots of doctor appointments, speech, massage, physio, plus school events, bowling and gymnastics and a husband that works shifts it leaves little time for work. My husband works hard at his job as a team lead in a factory. He takes all the OT he can and works shifts that change every week, we need his wage but most of all his benefits. He's not home a lot, so that I can work part time in my basement salon and take care of kids. My kids have grown up in my salon and all my clients are part of our family. This gives me the time to raise our children.  It's not always easy for either of us. He feels like he's missing out and I'm pulling my hair out cause I haven't left the house in a week or go to all appointments on my own. But we make it work. I say I have 10 years in the salon left and then maybe I'll get a job out of the house. Our son will be 23 and our daughter 18. But realize our son will still have doctors appointments, need rides, and help with everyday life. Even if he lives on his own he will need me and I will need him. And I do really love my job and my clients are amazing. If I have to rebook them because we have an appointment come up they are great about it, I only work a couple days a week and they will wait till I have an opening, they are a great group of people. And so it really does work out for the best and for our family.  I don't know how parents do it working full time and raising a family, I think that's amazing!!  We don't have a big fancy house or cars, we don't go on big holidays and aren't able to buy whatever we want. We DO have everything we need, a cozy little house, food in our bellies, clothes on our backs, and a loving family. So even though it's challenging at times we get through it........ Together. 💕

Open and Honest

Last spring we had a neurologist appointment with our son.  I had never asked about the future for him I try to do the here and now, but as he gets older I know we have to start the future process.  So I asked the doctor the dreaded questions, the answers I got threw me, he will probably never live a independent life, he has a cognitive delay. The tears rolled down my face, deep down I knew this but  hopeful thinking.  All I could think is he won't go to collage, get married, have children, live as a independent man.  I was a mess for days, everyone I talked to said 'oh what do doctors know?'  (That doesn't help by the way, listening helps.)  But the doctors do know and they prepare you for the worst and hope for more.  I got passed it and everyday focus on what's best for him,  but in the back of my head I was thinking maybe the doctors are wrong, lots of people told me he will do more.  As the days go on I see his sister who is 4.5 years younger starting to pass him, in reading, writing, maturity.  I have to say parents need to morn these losses it is truly a loss. I wouldn't change him for the world but it is a loss.

Yesterday I had a meeting with his school, I had to know if they saw him progressing or not, I know that this year is the make or break he's in Gr 7 if he isn't progressing then it is what it is. The reality is  .................................................................................................................................................................They dont see much progress, he is where he may stay.

BUT he reads, writes, understands and communicates. Not at his age level but he does it and isn't that something?  He is in the best school we could have him in and he will finish elementary and head to high school. He will stay in his school till he's 21, he won't be in learning GR 12 math but learning all the life skills he can, to be the best independent man HE can be.

It's hard on mom, dad and even little sister, but he doesn't know any different. You can't lose what you don't have. And so we will get through this bump too and move on.  At least I know where the future is going and where we need to head.  I don't write this for a pity party, this is the open, honest truth of our lives and as much as it sometimes hurts we love him with all our hearts and that will never change!!  He is our Angel Boy!!

Lunch time frittata

With a husband that works shift work, meals are sometimes hard to eat as a family.  I make this frittata when he's on afternoons so we can have a nice lunch together and supper can be easy for the kids and I.

Lunch Time Frittata

In oven safe frying pan, sauté 

1 onion

1/2 green pepper

1 Tbsp olive oil

While that's sautéing in a mixing bowl whisk together

10 eggs

1cup of shredded cheddar cheese

1 cup of cubed ham

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

Add to frying pan

Cook on stove top for 8 mins on medium then put in a preheated 350 oven for 10 mins or until middle is cooked through.  Cut and serve with garden salad. 

Mobility

When our son walks in unfamiliar places like sidewalks and stores he prefers to use his ID cane it helps him identify bumps and ramps. It has made him more independent and we have seen a big difference in even speed of his walking. It's a big difference on my body as well he would always lean on me to walk with him which was ok until he got so big.I wish that people one would not stare (he can see you) ask us we will tell you why he uses it and two move out of the way when he's coming. He has tripped a few people with it. Lol. He still has trouble with remembering to stop and look both ways or if he does stop by the time he thinks it's ok to go something may be coming. So people who drive be aware when you see a white cane and slow down. He won't be walking anywhere on his own yet but really wants to be able to walk to Nanas and Papas by himself so practice practice practice. Nan might have to stand at one corner and mom the other but someday he'll do it. He has Orientation and Mobility class at school which helps him with these skills.  It's so important to us to have him as independent as possible for him. We also have a wheelchair for him for long trips eg:amusement parks ect but I do use it in malls too. I do all the lugging of bags, coats, purse and the kids, so its easier for all parties for him to be in the chair. That way my hands are free for other things and he's safe sitting, his sister even gets rides on his lap if she's tired out too.  What people dont understand is how it effects the caregivers body when the lugging and leaning is up to them. Even going to doctors appointments are exhausting for the caregiver, mind, body and soul. I wouldn't change anything about our son but we do use mobility devices to help with the day to day tasks that come up. So when you see a person with a cane or any device and you think maybe they dont look like they need it just be aware they wouldn't have it if they didn't need it in some way to make life easier. 💜

Future

Lately I have been wondering why life seems to be going so fast.  It occurred  to me that every season moves into the next and we really never get a break.  They put Christmas stuff out with Halloween, valentine's out right after we are out of Christmas and I saw some Easter out the other day also, we are only in January.  So I see why we are always looking at the next thing instead of just enjoying where we are. When my kids ask what's next lately I've been saying lets just live for  today lets not wish our life away.

These future thoughts have been in my head a lot lately with our son.  What will the future hold for him?  Where will he live? With us, on his own or in assistant living??  Will he have a job? Get married? Have children?  All questions that probably the answer is no, but we can always be hopeful.

The last couple of weeks Ive asked those questions a lot because I have been noticing a change in him, he doesn't seem to be progressing and maybe a little of regressing. Speech has been awful with a lot of stuttering, he seems to be at a slower pace all together and processing thoughts takes a long time.  But he has been off his schedule with Christmas break and snow days so this is really his first week of school. We keep thinking once he's back on schedule maybe things will get better............

And if they dont well that means a call to his neurologist. Which to be honest opens another can of worms.  I have a meeting with the school to see if they are noticing. His respite worker has noticed it too. Is it seizure activity, hormones, low iron or something else??  What ever it is we will deal with it as always. Because no matter what it is we are his family and we will do anything in our power to make him a happy, healthy, and as independent as he can be person.

So instead of thinking about the future, his future I'm going to try to live in the now and help him with that, and as the days go on we will figure out what to do and how to do it.

When your in the store next skip the valentines isle skip the Easter isle and just live in the here and now because if we keep looking for the next we will be back at Christmas wondering where the year went. 💜

Ivan's dip

Super Bowl Sunday is just around the corner, here's a great dip to make. One of my husbands favourites, its so good and easy to make. Things you should already have in our fridge. Enjoy!!

Ivan's dip

1 8oz cream cheese

1 Tbsp. mustard

1 cup sour cream

1 cup mayo

2 Tbsp. worcestershire sauce

Beat all together till smooth and place in bottom of 8x8 pan, cover and chill for at least 30 mins.  

Top with your favourite salsa and serve with nacho chips.  You could also add shredded cheddar cheese on top also, but we like it like this.